Dean: "Well if you think it's a big deal..."

Lisa: "For the last time Dean I am not going to call you Pokey!"

Dean: "Not even during sexy time?"

Lisa: "ESPECIALLY not during sexy time!"

Lisa: "How was I to know the TV was loaded?"

Dean: "Bobby said those magazines were safe..."

Lisa: "1950 era Readers Digests covered in an inch of dust?"

Dean: "Can't say he didn't warn you..."

Lisa: "We were bored, not desperate!"

*Lisa and Dean sharing their past sexual relationships*

*Deans turn...*

Lisa: "THAT many? You must have been in a state of permanent exhaustion..."

Dean: "I forgot one more - the angel in the back seat of the Impala..."

Lisa: "An angel? Not - Cas?"

Dean: "Wha? No! Former Preachers daughter now fallen angel! Anna. No Cas!"

Lisa: "Orgies, strippers, bartenders, waitresses, cops, cashiers..."

Dean: "You wanted to share..."

Lisa: "I think I'd feel better if it was Cas..."

Dean: "I'm sorry Lis..."

Lisa: "I know -"

Dean: "I was desperate."

Lisa: "Yes but my great grandmothers linens?"

Dean: "Any tornequet in a storm I always say..."

Lisa: "She made them by hand... stitches so intricate..."

Dean: "Did I mention I was bleeding to death?"

Dean: "What can I say?"

Lisa: "I don't believe you..."

Dean: "Lisa c'mon..."

Lisa: "You're trying to protect us-"

Dean: "No. Yes. I mean - no one knows what the myth arc for Season Eleven was!"

Lisa: "Maybe you could summon Crowley?"



See Nate? Even Lisa wants to know!" AC22

Lisa: "And why exactly am I not mentioned in the Winchester Bibles?"


Dean: "Uh, did I mention how pretty you look today?"


Lisa: "Can it, Pokey!"

Dean: "Well, Bobbys downstairs, Bens upstairs... Impala?"

Lisa: "Not after you had that tramp angel in the back seat!"

Dean: "I knew I was going to regret coming clean..."

Lisa: "I can't unsee it..."

Dean: "I'm sorry you had to witness that..."

Lisa: "It was unlike any foot massage I've... and what was with the glass of milk?!"

Dean: "Let me guess. He called her Tori?"

Lisa: *Gasps. Tears welling in her eyes*

Dean: "Damn it Bobby!"

.
Dean: ...and don't pull the handle in the closet.
.

Lisa: "So what's this I hear about you and Crowley?"

Dean: "It's nothing. He has a crush on me..."

Lisa: "A bromance? Great. Orgies, strippers, bartenders, Angels and now the King of Hell?"

Dean: "Well technically he's still a punk ass cross roads demon..."

Lisa: "Yeah, like that makes it sooo much better!"

Dean: "Hey! You wanted to share!"

Lisa: "You have to talk to Ben..."

Dean: "About?"

Lisa: "Ever since you showed him-"

Dean: "What?"

Lisa: "The anti-bully? Now he kicks everyone in the nuts! The paperboy. The pizza delivery man. The cat!"

Dean: "You mean the pussy-"

Lisa: "Pull up there Pokey - unless you want me to demonstrate his moves..."

Lisa: "I reached out to you..."

Dean: "When?"

Lisa: "You were on that dating site - Impala67?"

Dean: "Did you?"

Lisa: "You totally ignored me. So what, I'm not good enough for you now?"

Dean: "Uh..."

*Prays*. "Damn it Cas you said you wiped her memory! Cas? Cas!!!"

.
Lisa: Yoda is Bens father.
Dean: You said you taught Yoga not Yoda!
.

Lisa: "Dean, I love you. I've never felt this way about anyone before. I-"

Dean: "Did I mention me and Sammy are taking off? Yup. Right now as a matter of fact... Sam!!!"

Lisa: "Is it something I said?"

Lisa: "I have a type you know..."

Dean: "Ruthless sexy psychopathic killer of the supernatural?"

Lisa: "I was thinking more like bar back with sleeve tattoos and no address..."

Dean: " I wasn't thinking..."

Lisa: "It's not like I couldn't have made mine Gu-"

Dean: "I didn't know it would upset you..."

Lisa: "So you'll-?"

Dean: "Delete my Pokey Twitter pic right away..."



Whipped Dean is whipped...AC22.

Dean: "So good news. Ben will be fine..."

Lisa: "What kind of psycho arms his bathtub soap?"

Lisa: "Bobby tells me you exorcised a hell bitch of a demon here..."

Dean: "Me and Sam. It was intense! I -"

Lisa: "So do you think she was prettier than me?"

Dean: "Uhm..."

Lisa: "Well?"

Dean: "Sammy! We're leaving. Now!"

Lisa: "You love that damn car more than me!

Dean: "What!?"

Lisa: "I need you to show that you care about me just as much!"

Dean: "Okay, when we get home I'll throw a tarp over you and leave you out in the garage for a year too!"

Lisa: "Would it have been too much to ask for you to save us a piece?"

Dean: "That night I shoved Ben... I was a vampire! I almost ripped both your throats ou-"

Lisa: "Oh save it! If you really want to leave us then just go. I read Route 666!"

Dean: "Okay! I'm ready for some hot yoga!"

*Half hour later about to pass out*

Dean: "Okay! Sexy time starts any minute now - right?"

Lisa: "Dean, it's not that kind of hot yoga..."

Dean: "Damn it!"

Dean: "Was that a ghost I hear?!"

Lisa: "Dean, sit down and finish our conversation..."

Dean: Did you see that light flicker? I better go lay down some salt..."

Lisa: "That's all your going to be laying down if you don't get back here and talk to me!"

Lisa:" Your Ben's real father." Dean:" I knew that Lisa! Took you three seasons to tell me that! Where is Sam when you need him?" #Captions

Lisa: "I have to be honest..."

Dean: "I'm really Bens dad?"

Lisa: "No."

Dean: "You're pregnant?!"

Lisa: "Definitely not."

Dean: *Smirking* Don't tell me - Bobby?"

Lisa: "Soul-less Sam. We're running off together!"

Dean: "So a ruthless, sexy, psychopathic killer with daddy issues isn't enough for you?"

.
Dean: The outhouse is next to the ghouls grave.

Lisa: We'll only be here a few years though, right?

Dean: You'll love it. Saturdays we like to blow torch demons in the basement.

Lisa: gasp... oh, dear God..



Suddenly, Lisa longed for her golden years when she was pimped out by the Mexican Mafia.
.

.
Lisa: We'll only be here a few years, right?
Dean: You'll love it. Saturdays we blow torch demons in the basement.
Lisa: gasp... oh, dear God..
.

.
Dean: Bobby sure likes Ben; took him down to the panic room. But...
Lisa: What?
Dean: Why would Bobby's parole order forbid contact with children.
Lisa: Oh, my...oh, my...BEN !!
.

.
Dean: Bobby's been married 3 times. His first 2 wives died of mushroom poisoning.
Lisa: And the third wife?
Dean: She died of stab wounds.
Lisa: Stab wounds? What happened?
Dean: She wouldn't eat her mushrooms.
.

.
........................................THE EVIL THAT MEN DO
...............................Part 1 - Watch out for broken people

The scene is a courtroom in session. Bobby Singer sits at a table, with his lawyer, wearing a straight jacket, handcuffed, hobbled with leg restraints and fitted with a bite mask much like Hannibal Lecter. Sam, Dean and Lisa are in the audience.

Prosecutor: What did you see at Mr. Singers that night?
Deputy: We observed Mr. Singer engaged in pedophilia with a minor and ordered him to stop.
Prosecutor: Did he comply?
Deputy: No, your honor, it took 4 deputies with a crowbar to pry Mr. Singer off the child. Then we got to..er...we had to taser Mr. Singer repeatedly and hogtie him.
Prosecutor: Good...good. Was there anything else?
Deputy: We discovered 500 tons of child porn belonging to the defendant.
Defense Attorney: Objection! It hasn't been established that the child porn belongs to Mr. Singer.
Judge: [leafing through Bobby's porn] Overruled. Mr. Singer is on every page of this filth and it goes back 30 years. Who's this other naked man with you and these children, ...........Mr. Singer?
Bobby Singer: Oh, all right, you're going to find out anyway. It's John Winchester, my lover and partner in our worldwide, child-porn enterprise!

Next: Part 2 - How will our heroes, Sam and Dean, react to this startling revelation?

Sam & Dean: [are staring blankly as if their world's been turned upside down].
Dean: This is more than I bargained for.
Sam: I don't believe this is happening.
Judge: [still reading the child porn] I just can't believe what I'm seeing here. This is great. I mean great evidence. Bring another box over. Call your next witness.
Prosecutor: The State calls our expert child trauma witness and Ben Braeden.
Trauma Expert: Now, Ben, this is Superman the action figure and I want you to pretend you are Superman here and point to where the bad man touched you.
Ben: [crying and trembling Ben silently points here and there on the doll] Bobby Singer hurt me. He hurt me awful bad, your honor.
Judge: [distracted from reading Bobby's child porn] You done, kid? Take your seat. Bailiff, the evidence inventory lists videos. Bring them to me. This Bobby Singer is a ...........monster.
Bobby: You have no right to judge our love! Those children were the light of my life!
Judge: Any adult who uses a child for sexual gratification is evil and you Mr. Singer are evil.
Bobby: John Winchester was the love of my life! I loved you John! Oh, God how I miss you!
Sam: [feels dizzy and has bent over and put his head down to avoid passing out]
Dean: [just threw up in his mouth a bit]
Judge: Bailiff, get one of the ball gags from my chambers and muffle Mr. Singer. Oh, not the ball gag with the nipple clips - that one's, uh, well of course it's not mine.
............It's...it's...special evidence.
Bobby: I am as God made me! Ben! Ben! There was love in my heart! I did it all for you!
Bailiff: [brings the judge a box of Bobby's child porn videos] There's 10,000 boxes of these videos, Judge.
Judge: Good..good are they all in color? It's my sworn duty to examine each and every one of them. How I suffer for my profession and the good people of this State.
Bobby: [Bobby has broken down in wracking sobs, his secret life has been revealed for all to see]

Next: Part 3 - Sentencing. Will there be justice?

Bailiff: Sentencing, your Honour.
Judge: [Putting the child porn down] Oh, all right. Defense, what do you say?
Defense Attorney: Your honor, we feel that Mr. Singer would benefit with a small fine and perhaps some community service work. No prison time.
Judge: Good luck with that. This vermin is worse than Jack the Ripper. Bobby Singer, sentencing you to death would be doing you a favor. I hereby sentence you to 1000
............years in prison and that is to be spent among the general prisoner population. We'll see how long you last.
Sam & Dean: [undergoing repressed childhood flashbacks at Uncle Bobbys]
Sam: Dean, Bobby molested us!
Dean: Let's get out of here. I need a shower and alcohol, lots of it. Maybe heroin.
Sam and Dean: [Slip quietly out of the courtroom and Bobby Singer's life forever]

Abandoned and alone, Bobby Singer remains sobbing at the defense table. A broken child from an abusive father, Bobby Singer is now a broken man of the worst kind - a convicted child molester.

The courtroom is nearly empty. Two burly deputies, their attention focused on Bobby Singer, do not notice Lisa as she silently approaches Bobby Singer with a homemade, 3D-printed, plastic gun.

Lisa: [fires point blank as Bobby Singer's head explodes] Die, monster, die!
.

.
Lisa: Yoda is Ben's father.
Dean: Not Jar Jar Binks?
.

.
Dean: It'd be nice if we were coordinated.
Lisa: I'd love wearing army surplus and one of Bobby's hats.

For Dean, Lisa was a dream come true!
.

.
Lisa: You want me to wear flannel and one of Bobby's hats?
Dean: And I'll show you how to burp and spit and chew tobacco!

...............Lisa's future at the junkyard looked rosy
.

.
Lisa: What, no washing machine?
Dean: We use a washboard at the creek.
.

.
Lisa: I'm the first woman to live here since?
Dean: Bobby stabbed his wife to death.
Lisa: Oh, dear God.
.