--Robin's Rambles by Robin Vogel
I need to buy stock in a tissue company. Seriously. Kripke has killed me again, my heart, my tear ducts, everything. It's obvious that Dean's sweet, tearful farewell to Lisa (and let's face it, although he saved her son who might be his), their affair was only an affair, and while she is surely grateful to him and would have kept him around as a daddy for Ben and a highly satisfying lover afterward, I never thought of her as Dean's true love. She appeared in his dream, yes, and even mentioned Ben being at baseball practice, like she did here, but I just never got that TRUE LOVE vibe from them. They make a gorgeous couple, no doubt about that. It would have been more emotionally satisfying (with a different ending, probably), if she had told Dean Ben was his. Then again, maybe not. Dean has made up his mind to accept becoming Michael's vessel. I wonder if he realizes what that means for Sam, who he left nearly tearing out his gorgeous hair back at the hotel?
How exciting was that first scene, with Dean and Sam being chased by the demons, Sam all banged up, begging Dean to drive faster? Then the demons got them and were dragging Sam from the car? The contraption on top of the saviors truck was something I recall Jensen mentioning at one of the festsâ€”a giant sprayer on top of a truck? That was GREAT!
So the brothers encounter a nice little town that knows all about the apocalypse and demons thanks to a false prophet with only evil in mind. She tells them stories that get young Dylan killed (and he loved the Impala, poor kid), get Paul killed by a former friend, turn the townspeople against even their holy man by calling him a demon. It's frightening how easily people will trust someone like Leah, who appears to be innocent and wise, one of their own. It took a great deal for her father to realize something was very wrong with the creature who had his child's innocent face, but her willingness to burn children alive definitely gave him pause. Meeting Castiel, a true angel of the Lord, sealed the deal and enabled him to at least try to kill the Whore of Babylon with the special stake.
Speaking of Castiel, this dark episode needed some comic relief, and he definitely provided it! From the moment he staggered into Sam's hotel room, complaining that Sam's voice is grating, that he drank a liquor store (which must be how much it took to get him drunk), and grabs Sam's head to whimper in his ear not to ask stupid questions, I was just so glad to see that angel!
I understood Jane's grief over her son, I truly did, but her shooting Paul was wrong. She took Leah's promises too far, but that's what Leah's kind seeks to do, make everyone crazy, like religious fervor gone too far, creating mob rule. She does the same thing by naming people who are not living up to the rule of the angels, making the righteous burn those who are not. Fortunately, Sam, Dean, Cas and Gideon were able to stop that, but it could just as easily have gone down the same way Dylan and Paul did.
Now, about Deanâ€”isn't he a servant of heaven? Didn't he give himself over a while back, swear an oath to Cas that he would obey heaven as he had his own father? I'm guessing that's why he was able to kill Leah. Perhaps Cas assumed (ass out of everyone) that since HE was on the outs, so was Dean because he'd given him the oath, but apparently, Cas was WRONG! Dean was able to slay Leah, which makes him the right man for the job! So HA, Leah, all that nasty stuff you were spouting was fake, untrue and shove it up your ass!
Sam knows Dean better than anyone, and after all the fighting they were doing in the hotel room, it was clear Dean didn't care about anything anymore. â€œAngel world, angel rules,â€ says Dean, standing. â€œAnd since when is that OK with you?â€ demands Sam, incredulous. â€œSince the angels got the only lifeboats on the Titanic,â€ says Dean. â€œWho is supposed to save these people; it was supposed to be us, but. . .â€ â€œAre we supposed to stop fighting, roll over?" asks Sam. â€œI don't know, maybe,â€ says Dean, pouring coffee. Upset, Sam stands. â€œYou can't do this--to me--you think you're the only one white-knuckling it here?--I can't count on anyone else--and I can't do this alone.â€ (Brings back memories of Dean saying the same thing to Sam when he went to him at Stanford years ago.) This scene just broke my heart.
So when Dean had Gideon and Castiel safely in another hotel with Sam, he cut out in the Impala as quickly as he could and went to Lisa, where this scene unfolded:
Dean drives in the night, arrives in daylight at someone's door. He knocks, Lisa answers, surprised to see him. He asks about Ben. He's good, at baseball, she says. You moved, notices Dean, nice house, but Lisa knows he isn't there to discuss real estate. "You all right?" she asks, looking at his downcast face. "Not really," he says, "look, I have no illusions. I know the life I live, I know how that's going to end for me, whatever, I'm OK with that, but I wanted you to know that when I do picture myself happy, it's with you, and the kid." He smiles, then gazes down sadly and adds, "You don't have to say anything." "I know, I know," she says, "I mean, I want to. . .come inside, let me get you a beer." "I wish I could," says Dean, "take care of yourself, Lis." "No, wait, wait," she says, "you can't just drop a bombshell like that and then leave!" "I know, I'm sorry," he says, "but I don't have a choice." "Yeah, you do," she says, "you can come inside and let me get you a beer, we can talk. . ." He stops her and says, "Things are about to get really bad. Next few days the things you're going to see on TV are going to be downright trippy. Scary, but I don't want you to worry, because I'm making arrangements for you and Ben--whatever happens, you're gonna be OK--the people I'm gonna see next, they're not gonna get anything from me without agreeing to a few conditions." "Just come inside, please," begs Lisa, "and whatever you're thinking of doing, don't do it." He holds her hand in both of his. "I have to," he insists. "You can stay an hour," she says, "at least say goodbye to Ben." "Nah, it's better if I don't," says Dean, a catch in his voice. She nods, hating this. Dean presses a long, long kiss to her left temple as a tear slides down her cheek. "Goodbye, Lisa," he says. Sadly, she watches him climb into the Impala, leaving her life--and perhaps life altogether.
One thing Leah said to Dean rings true: Must be hard, being the vessel of heaven and having no hope.
Oh, Dean. I am crying for you, and for Sam, and the world. Why don't you just kill me?