“Dark Side of the Moon”
--Robin’s Rambles by Robin Vogel
"Knockin' on Heaven's Door" usually makes me cry, and in conjunction with the brothers, ALWAYS! The memory of the brothers playing with fireworks, having a great time together (and doing something John would have killed them for) also made me teary, especially with that song playing. A beautiful memory I wished Sam had shared, too. He got braces-girl grabbing his thigh (lucky actress who got to do that)! I HATED seeing the boys shot, it hurt my chest to watch such violence against them, and I never want to see them killed, no matter how many times it happens! Were those the two guys who helped force demon blood down Sam’s throat, by the way?
Glad to see Dean's looking for triplets and latex, he got his sexy mojo back, apparently. Take THAT, Famine! Once again, Dean gets to see their mother, but poor Sam, left out, can only watch. Notice how upset Dean gets when Sam says his Thanksgiving with Stephanie's parents--at age 11--was his first REAL one. That hurts Dean, because he feels just being together with his brother and father should have been enough for Sam, even with buckets of chicken and a father who passed out every year. It’s a throwback to the crappy Christmases, too, which Dean prefers to remember more fondly than Sam.
Was John involved with another woman? Something about the argument between John and Mary made me wonder. Why would she mention the two young kids? So depressing, Dean, four or younger, comforting his mother with his father gone. For the first time, Sam realized his parents did NOT have the perfect marriage, and there were bumps along the way. Mary was put on a pedestal after death.
I wonder what age Sam was when he ran away in Arizona, enjoying himself for two weeks, eating junk food, having a dog, while poor Dean went nuts trying to find him? Didn't Sam realize what he was doing to his brother, that Dean was beside himself worried? Was Sam that self-centered, or had Dean brought him up so well, he just wanted some me-time and felt he had the right to just go take it? Was that the same sense of self that allowed Sam to go off to college, breaking Dean's heart?
It' fascinates me how many of Sam's happy moments were Dean's very worst. I never got the crusts cut off my PB&J, says Sam, I don't look at family the way you do. It seems as if Dean's four years with his mother made all the difference, didn't they? Dean had four years of a normal life, Sam really had none, only those snatches that Dean was able to provide him on the road. Ironically, it's that upbringing that probably enabled Sam to have the strength to pull away from John and Dean, to go away to college and try to leave the hunting life behind. I do NOT fault Sam for this, not one bit. Dean should not be laying a guilt trip on his brother for going to college or "leaving your family." That's the NORMAL thing to do! Ah, but the Winchesters are NOT normal, especially Sam, which is why Jessica died, and why he was pulled back in. Yet even now, after all they have been through, Dean still faults Sam for going to Stanford. Truth be told, Dean is the broken one who couldn’t let go.
I enjoyed the visit back to the Roadhouse with Ash, and he was as much fun as ever. Now we know for sure he died, right? Hm, I went to Disneyland and never felt any anti-Semitism--and I'm Jewish! I'll have to return there, identify myself and see what happens.
I really didn't get the bit about soul-mates and sharing--was that a veiled reference to Sam and Dean somehow? Can anyone explain it to me? Hey, if heaven is as Ash describes, I sure hope I can be one of the travelers. I don't want to be stuck in just one place! The brothers were actually surprised to learn how many times they had died--and how many times they were unaware of it. The angels "Windexed" their brains? It's as good a term as any, I guess!
What confused me is that Ash immediately found Sam and Dean, but didn't know Jo and Ellen were dead? Why not? You would think he would home in on them instantly, given how close they were? I wonder what governs such things, because that struck me as odd. And why hadn't Ash touched base with Mary or John? We know Mary is up there, so why no communication? Is it because Zach is keeping her tied up somewhere? Did John make it to heaven? I always thought so, once he escaped hell. Strange.
It was GREAT to see Pam again, whole and seemingly happy. She loves heaven, it's one long concert, so terrific she really does seem to be trying to sell Dean a time share, urging him to become Michael's meat suit. I couldn't help but feel she was Zack's puppet, and it really bugged me. It also seemed out of character for Pam not to be calling Sam Grumpy.
Finally, why does Pam kiss Dean? How many times does she mention how much she likes Sam's ass, and kids him for staring at her rack? If she was going to give one of the brothers juicy smooches like that, I was sure she would have popped them on Sam. Nope, this Pam was acting OOC, at least for me. The final scene here was terrifying; Mary's eyes turning yellow, her nightgown bloody, as she tells Dean she never loved him and begins relating the night she burned. Her voice gave me the chills! I felt awful for both Dean and Sam as their mother turned into a monster.
No surprise that Zack, the bastard, is behind Mary's cruel behavior. When he's nuzzling her, insinuating that the two of them are sharing a sexual relationship, I suspect the Winchester brothers and I threw up in our mouths. I'm sure Zack can force Mary to do whatever he wants, but I'd bet the REAL Mary wouldn't have anything to do with him if she knew what he was doing to her beloved sons. Gross! Poor Zack, a bully and braggart, used to be a big fish in heaven; now, thanks to the Winchesters, he don't get no respect anymore! AWWWW! GOOD! He reminds me of Henriksen when he used to bitch about how the Winchesters used to outwit him. Hey, the guys are GOOD! I hope that, whatever else happens, Zack ends up getting a punishment like Anna's. It would be nice. I mean, seriously, all the things he could do to Dean, and he settles on ordinary fisticuffs? What a sad little angel you've turned into, Zachariah! HA HA!
Joshua was SO COOL, interrupting like a mousy little secretary, but he had THE WORD OF GOD, and Zack had to go away or risk mad wrath, which even Zack dare not attempt. So he had to slink away with his wings between his legs. Again, I say, HA HA! Unfortunately, Joshua's news in The Garden is not good as far as Sam and Dean are concerned--God, though down on earth, will not help out in this fight. He helped them a lot, including allowing Sam into heaven in spite of everything he did””and he was the one responsible for putting them on the plane and resurrecting Castiel!
Dean, completely blindsided, takes this as another deadbeat dad move--but he will muddle through. Why does Joshua feel the need to point out that Dean is losing faith in himself, in Sam? That God was his last hope, and now that's dashed?
I wonder, though--Joshua is an angel who trims the hedges and is rooting for the boys. Could that have some significance for them? TRIMMING hedges, ROOTING? This time won't be like the last, adds Joshua, THIS TIME, GOD WANTS YOU TO REMEMBER. That means a great deal, too. Which was the last time, and what were they made to forget? This is all very important, folks!
I began to cry as soon as I saw Cas' downcast face. Once he looked skyward and said, "Son of a bitch!", I was done for, and the tears began to just explode from my eyes as snot spewed from my nose. (I don’t do one little tear like Dean, I cry like Sam, messy and snotty.) My husband ran from the computer room to make sure I had tissues. I did. He knew I was watching SPN, so he left fast. I cried harder as Cas handed over the amulet to Dean, who let it dangle from his fingers.
Sam assured Dean they would find a way out of this, together, and Dean's silent response was to drop the amulet that his little brother had given him on that depressing Christmas all those years ago into the garbage can. I was trying not to cry too hard in case there was dialogue, but there wasn't; Dean left the hotel, and Sam stood there, miserable, looking like he was about to cry, too.
I thought it was awful when Dean prayed for help, but this is so much worse! After Bobby's terrible experience last week, and now this? I'm hoping that, having been allowed into heaven, Sam will come up with something hopeful for all of them. Someone has to, damn it!
After I’d watched DARK SIDE OF THE MOON once, I felt kind of meh about it, I must admit. The second watching produced a completely different attitude””I loved this episode! I was really surprised, because I usually have a great first reaction to a SUPERNATURAL ep and love it even more after a second viewing. This is a rarity.
Perhaps I was distracted? I will say that I didn’t cry on my first watching, either. Maybe I was too stunned? Finding out that God was leaving the apocalypse to the angels and whoever was on earth was pretty jarring. ”Why does He allow evil in the first place?” is a question I ask all the time in real life. In my perfect world, we’d have no police, judges, lawyers, courtrooms, jails - you get the idea. Joshua’s question is a biggie with me.
So, my friends, this episode made me feel just awful for the Winchesters and Cas, yet it was uplifting to see Sam get his well-deserved salvation by being sent to heaven.
What did you think? Did it make you feel like you were knockin’ on heaven’s door?